Happy Birthday to me!

Today is my birthday. And I'll tell you what, if you like birthdays, as I do - get on social networks and sparkle your cool self. I already knew I loved Twitter and Facebook. Now, I love them even more. They added so much heartfelt joy to my life on this day. I'm incredibly grateful.

Have you ever had one of those moments where everything feels crystal clear? It rushes over you in a calm and powerful wave. That was my day today. See, most of you don't know that it was a long, windy, boulder filled, road blocked journey to get here.

I've always been hopeful, and generally positive. It was just underneath many layers of stuff. Sometimes thick, gooey, ugly, stuck stuff. It affected all areas of my life - health, relationships, money, career. And then, choice by choice, it unfolded. My life began to bloom.

I'm sharing this with you here for a few reasons:

1) It feels amazingly good to find oneself again. It's like discovering a treasure chest that I had both forgotten about and desperately searched for, for years.

2) There were so many times that I missed seeing, feeling, and acknowledging the support that I had around me. People, places, things, experiences were right there in the thin and thick of it. I was so busy being stuck and focusing on how much I didn't like what was going on that I often overlooked the obvious good things that were happening. Though I've become more aware of this as time went on, it wasn't until this morning that I was overcome with such a strong connection to life and how it supports me.

3) If you are in the shoes that I used to fill, the ones I still occasionally walk in, where all seems lost and there's always something not working - hang on. That feeling is just stuff. It may feel like you, but its not. You may seem stuck, but you're not.  There is a way back to you, choose it.

The way I got here from there was by taking care of myself. With food, with who was in my life, with where I worked. I began trusting myself more and believing in what I wanted rather than letting the trauma stories of the past run me. Essentially, I made a decision that I was worth more and that my contribution mattered.

That's how we make a difference - by being ourselves. Not our patterns, wounds, or fears. Choose you, even if you're scared or don't fully believe it's possible. I'm telling you, it is possible. I'm over here, waving at you to join me.

♥

So, I dedicate this post to you, as well as me - walking through the fire is better than staying there and getting burned. To our greatness. Happy birthday on whatever day you are born.

♥

Comments

[Tia Sparkles]

I love this post. What I find incredible is that in just 5 weeks on twitter I am forming friendships and actually caring about people!

My little twitterverse feels like a family ~ a big bunch of brothers and sisters tweeting in all directions. I've spent over 10 hrs on it today (excessive!) but its been a special day.

And I loved being a part of your bday experience, Vanessa, from the tweets to the cake and princess hike idea and your sharing of pix ~ if that's not family, what is?

I've been in your shoes too, and the fact that I am still alive and in such a good place now is testament to the human spirit. Your story just resounds in me! And I'm right there with you, hugging you.

Thank you again for sharing this, I am so touched by your vulnerability and strength.

So glad I met you and my other wonderful tweeples! xxxx

[Sarah Hough]

Wishing you a fabulous Birthday!!! Happy Blooming Birthday! XO Sarah {Part of the pink-Heels Blog network we're a part of)

[mahala]

It's amazing how much love can grow 140 characters at a time, isn't it?

I mean, I don't even "know" you and I wanted you to have a Happy Birthday.

Thanks for sharing your story, too. So many of us go searching for happiness. And we discover it's within us all along.

[Pink Heels]

Happy Belated Birthday! Sorry that I missed the big day!

[Diana Walker]

Happy Belated Birthday, Vanessa! Sorry I missed your day - I have not been on Twitter as much recently, that's why I must have missed the big day!
Love your post - you are very inspiring.
Diana