Let Your Life Bloom

It's all about relationships

This week, I had the good fortune to attend the Inbound Marketing Summit. Despite the occasional marketing jargon, the theme running through all the presentations was relationships. That it's about connecting with people, having authentic conversations, the power of listening, and ultimately, respecting the person/customer you are in relationship with. It's no longer a top down, pushy approach. It's about trusting the messenger and the message.

Years ago while attending graduate school, this same theme was present in every one of my classes. My degree is in Holistic Health Education. Not quite the same as marketing, but the concept was there too. We talked about the rapport between the health educator and client and how that affected the health of both individuals and the relationship itself.

It isn't just in marketing & holistic health. This new framework of relationships can be found in any field. We are becoming more aware of both the delicate and strong link we share with each other and the planet itself. The focus is shifting, from what can I get to what can I give. The old systems are breaking down. We see this happening all around us - in the economy, in health care, in marketing, in world relations. And it isn't just about areas of work, our whole understanding of what it means to be alive is changing. Each one of us is actively participating (some consciously, some not) in the creation of a new paradigm!

This is very exciting, unless you are too busy being caught up in the fear about what's "falling apart." That's the real epidemic. Though it's only one part of the picture, it can have a nasty grip on every part of your life. Fear of money, the swine flu, the terrorists, oh lordy, the list could go on.

I felt a bit of this fear wave at the conference. On the surface, we were talking about social media (blogs and the immense power in going viral), social networking (Facebook and Twitter to name a few), and inbound marketing (focused on relationships not ads). Underneath the specifics were the real questions: How do we make sense of the changes going on? How can we work with it and have it work for us?

Have you asked yourself similar questions about the changes going on in your life? Perhaps some of these soundbites from the conference can be guidelines for the changes you are facing. 

Follow known patterns of success.

Learn to listen and listen to learn. 

Find the clear signal through the noise.

You control the volume and the channel.

Make it (your life) relevant. Make it matter.

Take the info you have and weave it together. 

Engage with people in their own backyard, where they are comfortable. Speak with them in a way they understand, that's relate-able.

No matter how small your world of interest is, there is someone else out there that shares the same passion. Tell your story. 

It's not just about you, your product, your story. It's about you in relation to a community and the value you add to it.

Did you attend the same conference and collect valuable soundbites regarding new media, relationships, and change? Share them here. Or make some up and share those too!

Swanky hotels

I spent the past two days at the Inbound Marketing Summit. Lots of great info and conversations, all of which I look forward to sharing with you. There is so much wisdom out there, especially when you have a good group of people ready to chat it up with you over what they are passionate about.

As of this moment, my brain is slightly full so I will take you on a imagined tour of the swanky hotel the conference was held in. It was at The Marriott in downtown San Francisco. The door guy had quite the top hat on. Stained glass chandeliers decorated the ceiling. Mirrors and plants as tall as elephants graced the walls. Dark red retro furniture strategically placed around the entryways. The message "I'm a hip hotel, but not so hip that I don't feel inviting. You are safe to sit down here."

I love going to new places, admiring how they are decorated, getting to people watch (and see how they are decorated too!). You don't have to attend a conference to check out a swanky hotel. Walk on in, become the tourist persona. Ride their escalators and elevators. Make up stories about all the guests that have stayed there. And if you visit The Marriott in SF, make sure to get up to the 39th floor where you can see a 360 panoramic view of the city. Bellisimo!

Favorite restaurants

The other day I was thinking back to all the restaurants I've eaten at over the course of my life. A lot! By now, you love know I love food, love grocery shopping, love dinner parties, and you guessed it, love eating at restaurants. Though my taste buds have changed over the years, I still have many fond memories. I'm a big menu reader too. It's so fun to see all the different options.

These have been some of my favorites:

Felini's - Vegan pizza, french toast, and the best "Beets Caprese" I've ever had. You must look at their options.

Crepevine - Crepes, crepes, crepes! Need I say more? Oh, and super big salads.

Arizmendi - It's true, I no longer eat dairy, grains, or soy. When I walk by this place, oh, how I wish my body would let me without feeling sick after. They have the most unique combinations on their pizza like roasted fresh fennel, arugula, goat cheese, lemon/thyme oil. Wow. 

Wild Flour Bread - Speaking of bread. My husband and I came upon this incredbile place while visiting friends. Try their "Egyptian" - pear, fig, and candied ginger. The sticky bun is crazy good.

Hmm, I'm noticing a theme here! Just as soon as I thought I was over my grain and bread cravings, I see that they have reappeared. Delicious substitutes, anyone? In the meanwhile, go enjoy them for me! What are your favorite restaurants?

Ease and appreciation

Have you ever taken your body for granted? How easy it is to turn your head, reach for something, sit comfortably...until it's not. When you find yourself in an acute (temporary) or chronic (ongoing) situation where you can no longer move in the way you used to, it can be both frustrating and truly enlightening.

If you let yourself, you begin to gain a deep sense of appreciation of all the things you didn't notice before when everything worked seamlessly. The legs that move, the fingers that type, the sturdy back and fluid spine. You start to wonder...what else haven't I been noticing? Appreciating? That's one of the true gifts of pain, it opens your eyes to a new way of living and perceiving your experiences, right now. The opportunity is there, if you take it.

That's what all life is - experience after experience - full of gifts that you do and don't see. What good that surrounds you that you hadn't previously noticed?

How do you play and have fun?

Play, fun, and magical experiences. Yes, please!

Have you noticed that when you are having a good time and feeling light about life that everything seems easier? I see play as both an activity and attitude. And I'm always curious about how people bring that quality to their lives. What helps you to do that? I would love to hear your responses for research and practice purposes!

Here are some of the ways I play:

• Going to concerts & festivals
• Singing at the top of my lungs
• Making art, especially collages
• Air hockey (be prepared to be whooped)
• Fake but sort of real wrestling with husband
• Having my cats chase my hand under the covers
• Putting on a fashion show out of my friends closets (yes, it's still fun to do as an adult)

And you?

Got stories?

Behind the scenes, here in the forest where I live, I've been working on 9 books. Yes, 9! I've always loved writing. It has saved me, given me a place to grow, helped me to connect with other people, and it's fun. The books I've been spending the most time on recently are part of a trilogy. One is nearly complete, and the others are on their way.

This is where you come into the picture.

For one very special book, the focus is on synchronicity, experiences that feel magical, the ones that wake you up and make you contemplate this often unseen current guiding our lives. I've got a ton of stories to add to it and I'd love to hear yours. This is an opportunity to get your story published. Go here to get started or fill out the form below. Looking forward to hearing from you!

Bite size pieces of wisdom

I have this lovely little flip calendar that provides me with bite size pieces of wisdom every day. Since it is based on dates rather than the year itself, I have been able to use it for years now.

Here are a couple of gems for you:

"When the student is really ready, the teacher appears everywhere." Dan Millman, author

"Don't wait for something big to occur. Start where you are, with what you have, and that will always lead you into something greater." Mary Manin Morrissey, author

"The soul will break every taboo to live its life in the world. There's an astonishing passion and urgency inside each human being that demands to be addressed." David Whyte, poet

And in honor of Earth Day,

"This is what we should do today, when we are so pessimistic, cynical, and in despair - we have to know that the Earth is sacred. We have to go back to those ancient ages when Earth was kissed in the morning and in the evening. It was much easier to live that way, to see life as a symbol of strength, a symbol of optimism." Marija Gimbutas, author

Too much comfort food

A few weeks back, I wrote about being in pain and how I used food visually to comfort myself. What about when you use food literally to comfort yourself...as a daily habit? During the time that I worked with people who wanted to lose weight, this was the very reason that the majority of them were overweight in the first place.

Every one uses a method to comfort themselves, no right or wrong, it just leads to different consequences.

When pain is continual, the habit of "soothing" with food becomes so ingrained that you can see no other way to deal with it. When you pay attention to your choices, you begin to see patterns of coping. Then you inquire, "What's up with this? I see that I'm using food in this way as both a distraction and a method for feeling more control. Where in my life do I not feel control?"

The very act of asking is sometimes all that needs to happen to open the door to a whole new way of treating yourself. What helpful and healthful methods could you use to comfort yourself?

S-l-o-w down

Slowing down is one of the best choices you can make for your health. And, actually, for any area of your life. When you allow yourself to be slower, it opens up a whole new field of possibilities to consider. Where you once felt "I don't know," "I don't have time," or constantly hurried, you now feel calm, clear, are able to access previously unknown answers, and are more effective at everything you do. Plus, you're probably more pleasant to be around.

Don't get me wrong, it's not about always moving at a snails pace. We each have our own natural rhythm. Like all aspects of life, there's a balance. Continually moving at a fast pace can be addictive, straining your adrenals and nervous system. It can also create an energy of confusion.

This was evident the other day when I watched my husband move chaotically fast to get out the door. Normally, our indoor cats try to scramble out. Instead, they just looked scrambled. Ears twisted back, eyes wide, they ran in the other direction. They picked up and mirrored the energy that my husband was holding. To see it exaggerated like that makes you realize how frantic you actually are.

Here are two powerful ways to slow down:

1) Use your breath. Deep inhalation in, belly rises, ribs expand. Deep exhalation out, down the back of your throat, neck, and along your spine, grounding down to the support beneath you. Repeat.

2) Use your mind. Whenever there is a repetitive pattern of thinking, particularly a non supportive one, slowing down will help you switch gears. Take that repeated phrase and enunciate each of the words slowly, pausing to create space between them. The mind will loosen its grip on you. Truly.

What are some ways you've slowed yourself down?

Inbox Zen

How would you like to feel a sense of peace when you check your email? Instead of overflowing with to do's, resources, priorities, and the like - calm and clarity rule the day. That's right, it's time to tame your inbox.

I'm no stranger to inbox overload, so I was thrilled when I had the chance to review Inbox Zen: 7 Simple Steps for Making Peace with your Email. It's a handy e-book designed to help you get a grip on one of the most common time and organization suckers we all deal with - the growing inbox.

My favorite and most useful tip was:

Unsubscribe to newsletters - "If you stay subscribed because you think you’ll use the information one day, consider putting yourself on an information diet. And don’t be deluded into stockpiling information just because it’s free. If you’re not using it, it’s not free. It’s costing you time, distraction and loss of focus."

I've been seduced more than once by an opt-in box. It's rare that I read the newsletter or the free gift that I downloaded for signing up. Yet, they are all saved, in my resource folder, all 3000 of them. Did I just admit that outloud? Well, at least they are out of my main inbox right now!

Chapter 7, Monkey Mind: How to Defuse An Exploding Inbox, was also really helpful. Put that with the Action Checklist at the end and your on your way to inbox nirvana. Save yourself some frustration and gain some peace today by getting Inbox Zen.