Let Your Life Bloom

Following your natural rhythm

When's the last time you gave yourself the freedom to follow your nose, intuition, and natural rhythm? How often do you complain about not having the time to do what you really want to do? What would your days look like if you had full authority to set it up how it bests works for you?

It can be easy to forget that you have a choice in life. To think that someone else is pulling the strings and directing the show. Yet, we are all given the gift of discerning the most supportive and fulfilling path for ourselves. 

Whenever I meet someone who is struggling with health issues, it's inevitable that our conversation turns to a place of their regrets or wishes. A desire for change and longing to live one's truth. And, without fail, as they made a choice in the direction of their heart - whether small or large - health is restored.

Ever since I volunteered at Mountain Bounty last season, I became much more aware of this whole other world where following the natural rhythm rules the day. It's inherent in us as much as it is in the earth and the seasons. Pay attention to what you're being called to do. Step up to the plate. It's time to take that path.

Which way do you eat?

Eating food is a sensual experience. The taste, texture, smell. The feeling of being nourished. The sharing of a meal. How often do you eat your food in this way, for pure pleasure?

Chances are, not often. Like body language, we get into ruts or habits around our food. Which way of eating is most like you?

Eating as a chore - "I know I need to eat. Not really hungry. Nothing sounds good. Whatever."

Eating as a pastime - "There's nothing else to do. I'm bored."

Eating as an emotional cover up - "I can't deal, where's the chocolate?"

Eating as an energy boost - The car ran out of gas. You'll take anything, fast food to vending machines, to spike that energy back up, just shove it in there.

Eating as a multi-tasking activity - You're driving, talking on your cell, making a note to yourself at the stoplight, and shoving half a sandwich in your face.

Eating as a meditation - Setting an intentional space, calm and without distraction, taking a deep breath before your first bite, chewing slowly, being grateful for the meal.

Eating for pleasure - Overcome with compliments for the food, indulging your mind in food fantasies as you eat, enjoying the combination of flavors.

Eating for health - Being conscious about what you feed yourself, mostly whole foods, organic, nutrient dense and superfoods, helpful food combining, listening to your intuition around what would be best for you.

All of the above ways are ones I'm personally familiar with. The more I come to care for my overall health, the easier I find it to eat from the bottom 3 categories. It feels much better and I appreciate the whole experience even more.

Which way do you eat? I challenge you to try out the bottom 3 categories of eating this week. Leave a comment and let me know how it went.

What's behind the body language?

Have you ever noticed how people change their physical shape depending on what they're talking about? We use our bodies to emphasize a point, to convince ourselves and others that we are speaking the truth. Often times we do this unconsciously, and even out of defense. The most typical stance is crossing our arms in front of the chest when we are trying to make our case about something (which is more about being scared to be "wrong" or vulnerable). There's also the hunched shoulders, the leg tapping, the elaborate hand gestures.

These are usually thought of as tics or bad habits to break. I disagree.

Body language gives us clues as to where the person is coming from. There are so many different ways that we can communicate with language. Have you ever found yourself feeling reactionary to what someone has said? Or noticed someone being reactionary to you? Paying attention to and being curious about the body language someone is using can help you let go of the judgment, and become more compassionate. To be able to listen openly.

What if we drop down underneath the physical movement to see what motivates us to change our shape? From here, you'll find that ultimately, we all want the same things. We want to be believed, supported, acknowledged, related to, and understood.

How often have you taken a deep breath, got yourself good and grounded, and stood up tall before you spoke? Doing so gives you a minute to collect yourself and get clear on what you really want to express. Even if you're not the one speaking at the moment, when you do this, the other person in the conversation will match your physical stance without even realizing it. This match will open the door to a deeper understanding of each other, and alignment with your own truth. 

Notice your body the next time you speak. Make a conscious choice to breathe, ground, and stand tall as you continue talking. Feel the difference.

Cooling off

For your fun Friday enjoyment...

Remembering who you truly are

We are amazing beings, capable of so much greatness. Is that how you normally think of yourself? Or do you get caught in a loop thinking that your thoughts define you and your behavior is who you are? It's time to reclaim the grandness of ourselves.

That's the theme of the September Let Your Life Bloom™ newsletter (sign up to your right). Here's one of the tips from it:

Take stock
Sometimes we wear our past as war wounds, using it as an excuse for why we do what we do, why we need to avoid or run away, or why we can't do something new. We always have the choice to do it differently. It's time to see our past in a new light. We've been through a lot - in work, relationships, friends, family, money. We've seen a lot of movies, read books, most likely still know the words to the theme songs of TV shows that we watched as a kid rolling around in our heads (I belt out the tune to "The Facts of Life" when I least expect it).

All those experiences - all of them - shaped us into who we are today. There's always something to learn, understand, appreciate, and share about what we've gone through. If you had to lay it out on a timeline with the major influences highlighted, what are the themes? What are different ways of thinking about your experiences? Start to look at the totality of your life, what you've learned and how it's helped you clarify what you value. In doing so, you'll shed a layer, better integrate the past, and find peace with truly remembering who you are.

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I've mentioned before that I'm part of the Threshold Choir. Here's a one minute recording of the song "I am remembering" that we sang a few weeks back. It's a bit choppy at first, fyi (cell phone recording).

Always a powerful read, Marianne Williamson's memorable quote on remembering who we are...

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

How do you "do" meditation?

There's lots of books about meditation - the how to's, health benefits, what to do with the monkey mind, and more. This post is more about how you specifically "do" meditation. There's a concept and workbook that I wholeheartedly support called How you do anything is how you do everything. It's all about the way in which we approach what we're doing. When's the last time you paid attention to how you're being? How are you different when something's happening that you like compared to something you don't?

When we have the courage to look at how we are showing up in relation to life, we start to see our own strength. You begin to understand that you are more than your behavior, habits can be changed, and nothing is "the way it is." Things are the way you are and the lens you are looking at life through.

What does this have to do with meditation?

It is one of the easiest ways to watch how you "do" life because the only backdrop you are resisting against is yourself. There's no one else to blame, no external circumstance to distract. You are just sitting there, either with a soft focused gaze, or with your eyes gently shut, breathing. How is it to be with your thoughts? How easily are you distracted? How is your body responding? What are the stories you're telling yourself as you sit there? Do you react, dialogue with, or just notice those stories? 

No matter how you "do" meditation, the remedy for shifting where you are to where you want to be and finding peace in the moment - in meditation and in life - is to breathe. Follow your breath. When we get scared, resistant, angry, sad, we automatically restrict our breathing. It's a survival strategy and defense mechanism. It's a "get small to be safe" mentality. That worked back in the day when we had to run from animals. Now, it's time for a new way of doing and being in life. Meditation and breathing can bring about the exact transformation you've been longing for.

When you can relax into what's happening, be it your mental process in meditation or a challenging situation in life, you have much more access to your intuition and the ability to take effective action.

Here's what to remember:

1) How am I doing life? Use meditation as your playground to discover the answers.

2) Breathe into the distraction, resistance, and tight spots. Let your breath relax you. Use this in meditation and life.

3) Choose to notice, reflect, acknowledge, and breathe through how you're "doing" it all. Then: Speak your truth. Get clear. Effectively act. Transform.

That's your recipe for the day. Have at it!

Say grace and digest your food better

One of the most powerful ways you can start a meal is by expressing appreciation for it. Not only is it a gift to have food, it also nourishes you emotionally, mentally, and physically. I mean, really, how cool is it that we get to eat? That's something to be grateful for!

Saying grace acknowledges this gift, relaxes your body, and thus, allows you to better digest your food. The book A Grateful Heart is filled with a variety of ways to say grace. Here's a few of my favorites:

"For each of us food is the source of sustenance, the basis of life; and when we offer this gift to one another, we are not only nourishing each other's bodies, we are feeding one another's spirits. So receive - and give - the food of your life as the powerful gift it is." ~ Daphne Rose Kingma

"We begin by honoring the Light. We light these candles for our families, our beloveds, our friends, for all our relations; For those who are near and for those from who we feel an unwanted distance; For the newborn, for the elderly, and for all the wounded children. May the candles inspire us to use our powers to heal and not to harm, to help and not to hinder, to bless and not to curse. May their radiance pour out upon our hearts, and spread light into the darkened corners of our world." ~ adapted from a Passover Haggadah by Rachel Altman and Mary Jane Ryan

And one from my mom:

"Bless this food and all those who brought it forth from the planet, and for the planet for producing this beautiful, nourishing, and tasty food, for the people who put it together, and for being able to share it with each other."

Quotes on the body's wisdom

One of my favorite body oriented books is...

Discovering the Body's Widsom: A comprehensive guide to more than fifty mind-body practices that can relieve pain, reduce stress, and foster health, spiritual growth, and inner peace.

Not only is it filled with lots of practical information, it's also incredibly inspiring. There are quotes throughout the book. Here are some of my favorites:

"Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom." ~ Tao Te Ching

"The physical body is the mediator of all our experience. If it seriously malfunctions, everything we perceive is distorted. If it is relaxed and in balance, many of our difficulties fade to insignificance." ~ John Mann and Lar Short

"The prophets preach...that pleasure, not willpower and coercion, is how you most deeply transform people." ~ Matthew Fox

"Pain is the body's cry for help. You are doing something that the body can't take any longer. The body is very patient. It takes a lot of tension and abuse before it makes pain." ~ Marion Rosen

"It is not only possible but natural for each of us to love our bodies, to find ourselves beautiful - no matter how different, disabled, old, or battle-scared we may be." ~ Harriett Goldhor Lerner

I love growing my library. What other books on the body do you recommend?

I like to move it

Maybe it's because I worked with kids for 8 years, or I'm a child at heart. Either way, I can't help but smile and move it, move it when I watch this video. Happy Fabulously Fun Friday to you!

The BS radar

Yesterday my mom asked me how I was doing, I responded with "I'm OK." She said, "That doesn't ring true for me." I looked at her blankly. She continued, "That's Marshall Rosenberg's NVC way of saying - I smell BS." She was right. I wasn't being honest with myself, or with her. It was like the calm sea masking a stormy undercurrent.

Ever wonder why it is that we don't tell ourselves the truth? I do. Some act like they don't know what's true for them. I say we always know what's true, our bodies know, as do our friends and family. We know by something feeling "off." It takes courage to bypass the BS, and follow your truth.

I jokingly said to my mom, "What if we had a BS radar above our head that would start flashing every time a lie appeared?" Truth is, we do. It's called our intuition. I see this all the time in the work that I do. It's incredibly handy to know when people aren't being honest with themselves.

I often wonder what our world would look like if we honored and lived our truths. I'm not talking about the in the moment judgments or habitual reactions that we can so easily succumb to. I'm referring to the truth in our hearts. The past few months, I've been catching myself in both little and big lies, and immediately stating "That's not true. Here's what is true for me right now..." It's a practice, for sure. One in which life only become richer and more genuine in the living of it.

Where do you need to tell yourself the truth? About your career? Relationships? Life dreams? Turn the volume up on your BS radar, listen to your heart, and get real. It only gets better from here.