Let Your Life Bloom

It's time. You are ready. Go!

Breaking habits. Goals. New Year's resolutions. Whether you are purposely creating change in your life or life's changes came up and bit you on the butt...hard, there's no better time to start than now.

As in, now, right now, this moment, yes now. Go ahead. Do something different. Scrunch up your face. Wiggle your fingers like you're casting a spell. Click your heels three times.

"But Coach Vanessa, that's just one little thing, and it's not even related to the ginormous changes I need to make to get my messed up life back on track."

Hold on, a little magic can go a long way.

No matter what form the change comes in, whether the task at hand is little or big, ANY movement in a different direction wakes up all the cells in your body and they start vibrating with joy, singing "Ah, newness!" Try it, it works. It takes a little practice and some deep listening, but eventually you'll hear and feel their little voices too.

Even if you don't know what the big plan is, haven't got the how figured out, are overwhelmed, burnt out, flabbergasted, or not sure what comes next...just do 1 thing differently. Repeat. Three times is a charm. A new thought will enter in. The light bulb will come on above your head. One of your Angels will whisper in your ear.

Yes, I think plans have their place. It's good to make goals. Great when you follow through with them and get the results you long for. And I have a soft spot for having a vision for your life, embodying your values, being of service, leaving a legacy.

But here's what's most important to me:

I want you to feel better.

Even a teeny tiny bit.

Sure, sometimes it takes awhile to turn things around, especially when they've been moving in a direction not of your liking for some time. There is a process to change, and it's good to line up the support you need to help you create the change you want.

In the meantime, while that process is unfolding and you are becoming more clear, I want you to feel better. Where you are. With what you have.

Now.

It's time. You are ready. Go!

Have you heard this story before?

Many years back, I attended a weekend workshop called "Secrets of the Millionaire Mind" based on the book by T. Harv Eker. It was as much about money as it was about your belief system, mindset, and how you play the game of life.

Like many workshops, in person or virtual, it was packed with great exercises, techniques to add to your toolbox, and a variety of sales pitches for more expensive programs offered. I don't mind the pitch so much as long as it's sandwiched between worthwhile content (and it was).

There was one program in particular I wanted to attend. It was coaching program (surprise). At the time, I didn't have the money to register for it. This really, really bothered me. At the end of the evening, I made my way to the stage as quick as I could and talked with one of the other speakers.

After thanking him, I proceeded to go into my story around how I wanted to attend the coaching program and how I didn't have the money for it. Our conversation went like this:

He looked at me directly and said - "Do you want it?"

Me "Yes."

Speaker guy, "Do you believe it's possible for you to have it?"

Me "Well, I want to believe. But I don't see how it is. I mean I really don't. I'm trying to get my basic expenses worked out."

He replied, "Are you willing to suspend your belief that it's not possible right now? Are you willing to believe that it is possible for you to be in this program?"

I nodded my head.

He continued, "Do one thing for me tonight. Every time you return to this subject in your mind, every time you start to tell the story that you don't have the money, stop yourself. Instead say 'I believe it's possible for me to attend this program. I see myself in it.' That's all you need to do. The how isn't important right now."

I thought for a moment he was egging me on, giving me a new age line or two, demonstrating his best efforts at salesmanship, convincing me to purchase what would benefit him. I mean, it was easy for him to say it was easy. He wasn't in my situation.

But there was a level of such genuineness, presence, and directness as he spoke to me, that it cut through my judgments about him as well as my story about the situation I was in.

Later that night, my thoughts roared back into town. "I don't know how it's possible. There's no way. I have to pay this and this and that. I don't like how my money situation is going. Why aren't I getting anything good out of this workshop?" I was on a roll. I made myself wrong, the workshop wrong, the guy wrong, money wrong, my money situation wrong. It was all a big bag of wrong.

So I did what perhaps you would have done - called my boyfriend to complain and dump my misery on him. I got voicemail. I talked nonstop. Blah blah blah. The voicemail then cuts me off and states that I'm over my allotted time. Ok, now I'm completely mad at the voicemail (As if it was specifically doing this to me!). I hit the button to start the recording again. I repeat the same story, almost word for word. Because, of course, my suffering was very important and must be covered thoroughly.

Same thing happens again with the voicemail.

I take a deep breath. Ready to throw the phone out the window. Then it dawns on me. I wasn't mad at the phone, the voicemail, or even the story itself. I was mad at what I perceived to be limiting me. I was mad about where I felt powerless in my life.

For the third time, I tell the story into the phone. This time more deliberately. This time with new awareness of what I was really upset over. The story no longer had an emotional charge, because it simply wasn't about the story anymore. I finished what I had to say in record time, with one minute even left over. I let the voicemail continue to record my silence on the other end.

It finally beeped and asked if I wanted to send the message or delete. Without thinking twice, I pressed delete. I didn't need the story anymore. I didn't need to dump it on anyone else and I certainly didn't need to repeat it in my head. It was only a cover up anyway. A distracting excuse from the real issue - Me & how I use the power I have.

I had hit a point where I remembered my own power - the ability to change my circumstances, my stories, and my belief in what was possible. I couldn't turn away from this truth. I had to reclaim it. To do so, I started with what the speaker guy suggested - suspend the how and just see it as possible. So I did.

The next day at the event, out of 2000 people there. The speaker noticed me and asked if I was still believing in possibility. I nodded emphatically. The day continued. I partnered up with another woman for one of the exercises. I recounted the story I just told you here. The program. The money. The possibility. The repetitive story. The realization of my own power. Reclaiming that. Letting the story go. Being open to possibilities.

In telling that story, what I learned, and how much had felt like it internally changed for me in less than a day, was one of the most empowering experiences. What happened next may surprise you…

The woman I was partnered with gifted me the program I wanted. $1500. Right there. She sat with me as I filled out the program application and payment. We walked over to the "store" and she handed over her credit card to the processor person. Just like that. Ha! You tell me what's not possible. I'll refute you every time.

Have you got a story looping over and over in your mind? Do you feel the urge to "dump" it on someone else? Want freedom from that? Heck, want to just feel better?

I'll tell you right now, it's not about the story and dumping won't make you feel better in a long lasting way. The issue (and it's the same for all of us, believe me, I've seen it in countless clients over the years) is about where you think you do and don't have power in your life. We try to make it about everything else under the sun. Clever distractions, that's all they are. Start with reclaiming your power and you will be surprised how quickly things shift.

I go over all of this, then some, and a bag of chips in the Get Clear Series. The info in that program has become the foundation for my experience of life being different than what you read above in this blog post. I want that for you too. It is possible.

FAQ's about Energy & Intuition

Soon, dare I say 24 hours from now, my new website Get Clear Series will be up and running. It will have the Get Clear energy and intuition series available to purchase as a work at your own pace program. You'll also find many resources about energy and intuition to help you in being clear, strong, resilient, resourceful, and true to yourself. I've got a special running for the Get Clear series at $29 for the whole shebang. That's 8 classes on energy and intuition! This will be thru July 1, 2010. So hop on it. 

In the meantime, I wanted to share a few Frequently Asked Questions about energy and intuition.

Why is important to understand/know about energy?

✿ Helps you quickly gain clarity about what's really going on. You spend less time processing and trying to "figure it out" and can cut right to the core of the issue. It saves you time and grief.

✿ Helps you have a better understanding of where people are coming from instead of taking things personally.

✿ Helps you articulate your true feelings while also feeling safe to do so.

✿ Helps you feel more connected with life and have more compassion for others.

✿ Helps you transform fear and distinguish it from intuition.

✿ Helps you clearly hear your intuition and know what to do in any given situation.

(Read the benefits section to each of the classes & you'll know more about why it's important to understand energy)

How can I know the difference between intuition & fear, especially when there's a chorus of voices in my head telling me what to do?

✿ There are many techniques, physical markers, mental & emotional clues that will help you distinguish between the two. We cover this in the first class of the Get Clear series titled The Basics. You can also read about it in "Connect with Your Intuition in Five Easy Steps."

✿ Consider the perspective that on some level you already know the difference between intuition and fear, and I'm giving you tools to remember what you already know how to do: Transform fear and access intuition.

When you talk about energy, do you mean auras, meridians, and Chakras?

✿ No, that's not what I mean. Though, auras, meridians, and chakras are part of the energy anatomy we all have. You can find more info about those in ancient health & healing systems like Chinese Medicine and Ayurveda which have been around for thousands of years.

✿ The energy I'm referring to is two-fold, including:

1) The amount of energy we have throughout the day, what impacts that, and how to access more so you feel more vibrant and resilient in life.

2) What's happening beneath the surface, the energy dynamics of whatever is going on. For example, why you feel stuck, confused, and not sure how to access answers or create solutions. It's because your energy is scrambled. My goal is to illuminate and therefore, untangle.

I'm stuck. I feel like I've tried everything, including energy work to help me feel better. Nothing seems to be working. What do you suggest?

When I see this happen with clients, or heck even with myself, it's usually one of two issues:

1) Your health is out of balance, scrambling your energy system and creating lots of static with your intuitive antennae. For some, it's as simple as implementing the basics like having healthier food, restful sleep, movement, and drinking enough water, that does the trick. Nothing beats the basics. 

If you make unhealthy choices, especially on a daily basis, you're pretty much setting yourself up to be out of whack. It's a way to sabotage yourself from moving forward and invites in destructive energy from the outside to match the destructive energy you are choosing from an internal perspective. That's the law of attraction in action, for better or for worse.

Note: There are those dealing with health challenges beyond the typical "stuck." More serious physical mental, or emotional issues require trained professionals who are experts in their field. This doesn't mean that you only have the option of going with conventional medicine. There are effective energetic and natural approaches such as homeopathy, acupuncture, flower essences. If this situation applies to you, I'd encourage you to seek help.

2) The other most common reason I see people "stuck" and feeling unable to move the energy is because they are addicted to the trauma and drama of life. There is some payoff for them to continue down the path they are on, otherwise they wouldn't do it. It feels more safe to be in their own discomfort as a victim, blaming themselves or others for what they experience than to step up to the plate and live from a more conscious, empowered perspective.

There's nothing wrong with you if this explanation applies. But wouldn't it be nice to feel more strong, capable, and clear in your life? To have people, work, and environments support you rather than harm you? It's available, always, only you have to choose it.

Being aware, open, and willing to make new choices is the first step in transforming anything. The most skilled healer in the world can only shift your energy for the time that you allow it to happen. If you go straight back to making the same choices - in thought, feeling, energy, and action - then guess what? Right back to where you started before you got the healing session.

Why do you put the word "stuck" in quotation marks?

I do this because being "stuck" isn't actually possible. I hope to convey that in the use of quotation marks. Believe me, I know it feels like it's real. But, it's not. Everything that exists in you, outside of you, and in the universe, is in constant motion, constant creation, constant transformation.

I often think that the reason some people choose lives that appear to be the same, day in day out, is a way to help them feel more at ease with the constant motion happening. Don't we all love a little structure and organization? Chaos is only helpful when we can still feel clear in the midst of it. That's part of my intention in offering you the Get Clear series.

If you want to learn more about energy and intuition, you can:

• Purchase the Get Clear series (take advantage of the special, $29 through July 1, 2010) 
• Have a Get Clear intuitive reading with me, in 30, 60, or 90 minute options
• Read the Get Clear series and intuition posts
• Watch the Get Clear videos

***

Did you get your questions answered? If not, do share them below and I'll see what magic I can work up for the answers.

Let Your Life Bloom on the Oprah Winfrey Network!

Hi Blog friends!

Last week (with one week left to enter), I felt inspired to audition for my own TV show on the Oprah Winfrey Network. Check it out here.

As you know, I'm passionate about getting as many people as possible living healthy, fulfilling lives. I believe the way to let your life bloom is by always being true to yourself, following your intuition, and taking good care of your health. Healthy choices = healthy people = healthy planet = Happy Coach Vanessa!!!

I could say so much about the experience of just making the video itself  (and I probably will soon in another post, ha!). For now though, go vote your butts off, a million times or more, every day until July 3rd! This is very important. Consider it part of your daily self-care regimen.

What's that? You want to know other ways to help spread the word? Glad you asked. Here are some ways to do so:

* Send an email out to your friends, coworkers, & family encouraging them to vote.

* Remember, you can vote as many times as you want, you don't even have to watch the video to vote. Feel free to leave a positive comment under the video.

* If you have a Facebook account, you can post the link onto your wall by clicking on the link icon in your status update, inserting http://bit.ly/CoachVanessaOprah and encourage your Facebook friends to share the link and vote multiple times.  

* If you have a Twitter account, tweet about it! Here are some sample tweets -

Getting connected with your intuition on national television? Yes! Vote here http://bit.ly/CoachVanessaOprah

Ready to be an empowered health consumer and shape the culture we live in? Find out how by voting here http://bit.ly/CoachVanessaOprah

Are you a bright light person sharing your good vibes with as many as possible? Become one by voting here: http://bit.ly/CoachVanessaOprah

Let Your Life Bloom by voting for @CoachVanessa's debut show on Oprah's OWN TV http://bit.ly/CoachVanessaOprah

* Also important: Hold the vision of me being picked as one of the final 10 contestants to be on Oprah's reality show which will determine who will get their show on the Oprah Winfrey Network. Send good vibes and lots of love around this for bringing Let Your Life Bloom to millions of viewers. Onward & upward!


Thank you thank you thank you!

Behind the scenes on the energy & intuition front

For the past few weeks, I've been brainstorming, writing, creating, visioning, and then some about the Get Clear energy & intuition series. It's been my desire for the past year to put it into a format that can reach more people. After using these concepts and tools with individuals and groups, seeing the results and how much better people feel, I can't not share it with more folks! Plus, it's been amazingly good to review concepts I feel so passionate about. How often do you spend time teaching what you know and love? It's good for the soul, I tell ya.

What you can look forward to in the coming weeks before the Get Clear series is out as a product are blog and video posts on the following topics:

✿ Why NOW is the time to get clear

✿ How to distinguish intuition from fear

✿ What the difference between energy and intuition is and how they are two sides of the same coin

✿ How everything around you is conspiring to bless you and constantly giving clues as to the most supportive, healthy path for you

✿ Frequently asked questions about energy and intuition, including why it's important to understand energy and how it's the gateway for connecting with your intuition

In the meanwhile, you can book a Get Clear intuitive reading with me in 30, 60, or 90 minute sessions. Do that here. It is by far, my most popular offering. And you can still take the Get Clear series one on one with me. In it, we'll cover the topics listed as it relates to your life. That you can do as an option here (scroll to the bottom and choose what you want). Looking for more info on intuition first? Read past intuition posts and the article Connect to your intuition in 5 easy steps.

Here's to living with clarity, grace, and ease. Imagine what we can create when we do this together as a global community, just beautiful!

Claim your happiness

This is the first of many posts in the Redefining Happiness series which will wisely (and sometimes wise-a**ly) explore the ins and outs of happiness not belly buttons.

For months leading up to the big move* we just made, there was a growing feeling of intense happiness. As in perma-grin happiness. Friends kept saying, "I feel like things will all fall into place for you when you get there." That was my vibe too. Sure, anticipation is normal in a transition like this. What I was experiencing was beyond that. I'm talking downright giddy.

There are many, many, many reasons as to why this has had the affect on me that it has. Some healing, some magical, some learning. Mostly though, it's a definitive, "I MADE IT!"

As I sat down to write a post to you, wanting to share all the details of how this came together and why it's such a big deal and how happy I am (insert angels singing), I hesitated. Now, that's curious. Why would I, or anyone, hesitate to share happiness?

It seems ok to share happiness as we recall the past or dream of the future. Yet, to be happy in the here and now seems taboo even though we all strive for it. We tend to relate to each other based on shared struggles and old wounds.

Sharing the good in our lives and having an authentic positive attitude is often seen as unrealistic, pollyanna, and there to be judged or jealous of. Noticing hesitation to share the specifics of my own happiness beyond "Life is good," led to one of my most frequently asked questions - What the heck is going on here?

The conclusion I came to is three-fold:

1) When you are secure in yourself, in your own power and ability to generate the results you want to experience in your life, you become a lot less concerned about how others perceive you. You care about them but never to the extent that they become the compass for your life instead of you.

2) When you are healthy and have a sense of internal balance (emotionally, mentally, and physically), it makes it a lot easier to trust your own decisions, your intuition, and the direction that your heart wants to take you in. You know in doing so, you become a role model for others and your happiness can be their inspiration.

3) How people respond to you is not about you. It's about them. If others judge or act jealous of your happiness, that's because they have either bought into the illusion that they have no power to change their lives (conclusion #1) or their health is out of balance which makes them act wacky (conclusion #2).

I am choosing to claim my happiness. It's something that I feared I wouldn't ever genuinely "have." To have reached this point, to have seen how far I've come, to have bumped around in the dark - for years - banging into walls between conclusions #1 and #2, I simply have to wholeheartedly embrace this. I have made it! It took a lot of courage and really challenging experiences to get here, and it does feel like a threshold that I've crossed. That's an anchor I'm never letting go of.

What about you? Are you ready to claim your happiness? If not, what do you think is standing in your way of doing so? What would it take for you to settle into your life in the most soul satisfying way?

* If you're new here, hubby & I moved to a whole new state last weekend. Very exciting! What new things are blooming in your life?

Why fear is your ally

We all have it. That feeling of being scared. Anticipating the worst outcome. Thinking things won't work out to our advantage. Unsure of the unknown. What do you do with it? How do you handle it when fear knocks on your door?

Some people pretend it's not there. Some try to talk themselves out of it using logic. Some look for all the reasons to justify why the fear is not actually fear, but the "truth." I propose a different response.

Here's why fear is your ally:

It showed up for a reason. It's got something to teach you. This doesn't mean that you have to go into the story of what the fear is about and then listen to it like a broken record. Au contraire mon amie. Like this post suggests, just by inquiring into the fear you begin to loosen its grip on you.

The good news is, anything that comes up in us does so for the purpose of being cleared out. So we can be more in alignment with who we really are. When we're able to do this for ourselves, it's liberating and helps us have more energy available to us for our daily lives.

One of the most powerful and easy ways to use fear to your advantage is by dialoguing with it. Ask it questions. Why are you here? What's underneath your freaked out words? Let it talk with you, and have patience with it if it cops an attitude. You'd be surprised how much your willingness to engage with it will disarm the emotional wave that usually comes over you when you're in fear. Keep in mind, it's false evidence appearing real. 

What are other helpful and healthy ways you could use to work with fear? Share your comments and thoughts here.

Lots more tricks and tips to deal with fear as an ally not an enemy coming up in next months newsletter coming out on April 1. Go ahead and sign up to your right and you'll also get access to the *free* Let Your Life Bloom™ teleseries with 27 guests on the topics of energy & intuition, holistic health & sustainability, leadership & legacy, and integrative coaching.

Coaching yourself with lists

We're not talking your typical to do list. Those are helpful, but a bit overused and pressure inducing. It's time to have more fun with list making.

Part of coaching is about helping you stay on track and keep you accountable for what you want to do. Yet, for me, the more important parts of coaching are about shifting your perspective, getting back in touch with how fabulous you are and how amazing life is, and being able to access real solutions for the challenges you face. When you open up to this, that's when you're in the flow.  The juiciness starts pouring in, and you get an even bigger picture of life, spirituality, and love.

Yes, all through lists! Try out some of these as a starting place:

Silly list - Especially helpful to bring in the nonsense when your mind is caught in the madness of over-thinking or you feel stuck in any way. Here's a few examples:

• Meow holiday songs. Silver bells. Frosty the snowman. Jingle bell rock. Do this with cats around, watch their ears go crazy listening to you.
• See how many places the tip of your tongue can reach on your face. 
• Hang upside down on your couch. 

Dream list - Anything you'd like to experience, no boundaries, let yourself play. After you write each item, ask yourself "What would this give me?" (i.e. peace of mind, adventure, freedom, etc.). It's a great way to visualize and then discern your values. 

Purpose list - What gifts do you have that you appreciate about yourself? What do people tend to compliment you on? How do you express and define your spirituality? Often, we get caught up in thinking that our purpose is one specific thing about us or what we're "supposed" to do in the world. We are many gifts rolled into one unique package. When you make this list, you get more in touch with that rather than focusing on what's not working in your life. 

What items would you add to these lists? What new lists would you create? Share your thoughts here...

Starting over

Do you remember what it's like to start over? A new job, new relationship, new house. The list is endless. We are always ending and beginning, transitioning between experiences. Yet, why is it, that when it's time to begin again, we hesitate, maybe even feel unsure or unclear, wondering where to start?

This is a question I've asked myself...several times. Because, boy, I've had to start over when I least expected it. You probably have too. 

Three reasons why hesitation takes over when starting over:

1) Fear of failure

Ever create a scenario of a future outcome that is not what you want to have happen? It's like you can't help yourself. As soon as you start dreaming of what you want, the inevitable fear of failure, of it not coming together, rears its ugly head. Next thing you know, you're using these imagined scenarios as an excuse to justify why you won't take action, because it just won't work it. I can't tell you how many times I've heard someone say "Well, I'm not going to get excited just in case it doesn't work out. I don't want to be disappointed."

Guess what? You may be disappointed (or not) with the outcome, despite how excited you get about it prior to it happening. Plus, getting excited is part of the fun (and purpose) of life. It also influences the outcome. This may be obvious, but...the future hasn't happened yet. What happens down the line is based on what you do now. The pivotal turning points in my life took place when I stopped lying to myself about what was possible and actually let myself feel the thrill of what it would be like to have what I wanted.

2) Attached to the past

We use the past as a marker, a point of reference. Have you ever said: "Well, that's what happened before," and then used it as your reason to stay in your safe, known zone even when it's filled with discomfort? The past absolutely serves a purpose. It shapes you, informs your passions, and hopefully, schools you on how to best live your life. We learn what works and what doesn't. The point is to apply the lesson, not repeat it, and certainly not use it against ourselves.

3) Analysis paralysis

Spending too much time deliberating the pros and cons can be one of the biggest time and experience wasters. I know, I used to be an expert at it. I realized that I was constantly creating triangle situations to process my way out of. This way or that? Two jobs. Two guys. Two housing situations. Hey, at least I narrowed it down to two choices! Yet, I'd often lose out on both options because I spent too much time trying to "figure out" which one was right for me. Thank God for intuition! Once I dedicated myself to listening, trusting, and following it, everything changed. Now, I make decisions in a snap. And, I tell you, that is a beautiful thing! Remember, deciding not to act, and instead float around in indecision is a decision.

Which of these types do you find yourself generally in? What helps you get present, start over, and move forward with ease and fun?

Self-Love Manifesta

What better way to let your life bloom than by making a declaration of self-love? I was recently inspired by Madly In Love with Me to put together a Self-Love Manifesta. Here's mine. Do share yours!

Self-Love Manifesta

 

I love myself.

I eat healthy, nutrient rich foods that nourish my body.

 

I love myself.

I rest when I'm tired, breathe deeply when I feel scared, and believe in my own strength.

 

I love myself.

I move my body with exercise, dance, flexibility, and power.

 

I love myself.

I fill my life with people that love me, creating my own community who are open to possibilities, supportive, and value themselves too.

 

I love myself.

I listen to my heart and its deepest longings - to belong, to contribute, to create, and to love.

 

I love myself.

I appreciate the little things I do to take care of myself, like brushing my teeth and drinking water.

 

I love myself.

I invest in my mind by reading inspirational books, writing down creative ideas, and engaging in solution oriented conversations.

 

I love myself.

I listen, trust, and follow my intuition knowing that it always leads me to the next best learning place in my life.

 

I love myself.

I laugh often, cry unabashedly, and sing out loud no matter how I sound.

 

I love myself because I know by loving myself life becomes more enjoyable and loving others becomes easier.

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